One Plus One Equals Six!

My cousin and I were having a take-away lunch in the park. It was a beautiful day to be relaxing on the bench, listening to birdsong and watching the human birds pass by.

We were talking about some subject, when I said:

“You know cousin, when we are conversing, there are really SIX people involved!”

“Come on, you’re pulling my leg, there’s only TWO of us here.”

“No, I kid you not. There are three people in my mind while we are talking and there are three people in your mind while we are talking.”

“I don’t believe it. Six people, that would be like talking in a crowd!”

“Cousin, relax, I’ll explain. The other day, someone asked me, how they could beat depression. So I gave them some dos and don’ts about beating depression.”

“What are you now, some kind of agony aunt?”

“Be quiet and listen, you might learn something. Okay, when I gave him my advice, I had an IMAGE of myself speaking. That’s one person. I also had an IMAGE of the person that was listening to me. That’s two people. And finally, I had an IMAGE of how the other person was thinking of me. That’s three people in my mind as I was talking.”

My cousin laughed and said:

“What did the IMAGE think of you?”

“In my mind, the IMAGE thought I knew what I was talking about. So, I decided to give him even more advice.”

“Now, lets go into the other person’s mind. He sees an IMAGE of himself listening to me. Then he sees an IMAGE of me talking on and on. Finally, he sees an IMAGE of himself thinking, “This guy must think I’m an idiot. He’s bombarding me with info.”

My cousin broke in:

“So, all the time you’re thinking, you are fabulous, he’s thinking you’re a jerk.”

“That’s right, cousin, you’re getting the hang of this now.”

My cousin smiled.

“Now, the person I was giving my advice to, walks away coldly and I think “How ungrateful.”

“Boy, that’s quite a story.”

“Yes it is, six people in a two way conversation, sort of a “Transaction of Selves”. Words and nonverbals working together.”

My cousin got up, abruptly, and started walking away.

“Hey, where are you going?”

“I don’t mind one on one talking, BUT I HATE CROWDS!”


5 thoughts on “One Plus One Equals Six!

  1. interesting! Kind of like a conversational baggage reveal, isn’t it? Maybe next time you could talk about how both sides hear different things in a single conversation!

  2. Well, pull out the prozac and while you’re at it a caplet or two of bupropian…Dave is at it again.
    For this piece of humor, Dave has given up his watering hole to meet with cousin Jim. This time
    he’s trying to convince Jim that six people and not just the two of them are having a conversation. As usual, Dave’s fiction is most entertaining.
    You’ll excuse me while I take my parazatine.
    Larry Primak

  3. If you really think about it cousin, I wasn’t listening to the birds, but I was watching the birds walk by. I had another image in my head when that beautiful red head with chiseled lips walked by. Then I had an image of my wife standing behind me. So your thought
    of six people in a conversation between two people is only the beginning. I still don’t like crowds. LLC Jim

  4. DAVE—We need to talk. Gather up all your personalities and I’ll find mine. We’ll meet at the watering hole. Get a table for 10 or 20 and we’ll work out a schedule for who talks to who. In the meantime, Larry Primack and I will have breakfast at our own watering hole known as Noshers Deli. Corned beef on rye is our order. Take care.

  5. Writer Dave Here, Tom do you remember Ashkenaz Deli on Morse Avenue in Chicago? My mother and I used to go there and have a delicious corned beef on rye with a large dill pickle on the side.

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