One day I met my cousin, Jim, for a drink at our favorite watering hole. I always like to have a few drinks with him because we have the most interesting conversations.
“Hey Jim, I was just thinking the other day about our brains.”
“What about them, Dave?”
“Well, it’s an amazing organ. Three pounds of power sitting inside your skull, it controls everything we do and think.”
“That is amazing, Dave.”
We both took a couple of gulps of our beer and contemplated.
“Think about all those great brains, Einstein, Edison and Shakespeare. The human brain created the computer,skyscrapers, cars and all manner of things.”
“Two more beers here, bartender,” said cousin Jim.
“Yes Jim, this three pound mass of gray matter in our heads is very important.”
“You know, Dave, I never really thought about it, except when I have a headache!”
“And that’s a shame, cousin Jim.”
“Well, Dave, I think about other parts of the body like my biceps, buttocks and reproductive organs.”
I shook my head.
“Well, the other day I thought a lot about the amazing workings of the brain.”
“Oh yeh, what happened?”
“I was in my car waiting for the light to turn from red to green. There was a lot of traffic around. As I was waiting, a car creeped into the intersection and stopped directly in my path!”
“Gee, cousin Dave, that was an inconsiderate move.”
“I’ll say! It was a stupid move! Well, anyway, the light changed, I couldn’t go forward and the people behind me couldn’t move either. We all just sat there because this jerk barred our way.That’s when I started thinking about the brain. There sat this creature with three pounds of brain and all those millions of cells, incapable of a simple thought: “I’m not going anywhere, so why block the intersection?”
I took a swig of my beer and continued.
“Now, this jerk’s brain had a problem, lack of information. The computer wizards call it “INPUT”. I decided to give the dummy some input.”
“What did you do?”
“I got out of my car and yelled at him: “You dummy, what did you block the way for?”
“That told him, cousin Dave.”
“All the people behind me honked their horns and gave me the thumbs-up sign. This was an indication that their brains were in good working order.”
“Want another beer, Dave?
“Yes, please. Where was I? Oh yes, eventually the jerk moved on and as he went he stuck out his tongue at me. My input was rejected, he’d block another intersection some day.”
“You can take rejection, Dave.”
“Well, cousin, I’m still enthralled by the human brain. And someday, I hope, science will come up with the answer, of why brains are wasted on so many DAMN FOOLS!”
I can’t believe I’m the first to leave a comment. Wow. I am excited. So excited in fact that I can’t think of anything to write. I think I’ll get in my car and block an intersection. You see Dave, my 3 pounds of brain is telling me what to do. This voice is much clearer than the others the doctor tells me to ignore.
I like it, all though I would not have gotten out of my car. I would have run into his car and claimed he ran the red light. It would have worked too because all the people behind you would back you up as they were mad at him too and other people don’t want to get involved because it takes time to get involved. LLC Jim
Ha ha! Good one. Lots of morons out there for sure. These two are funny! You should have been a bartender, Dave, with all those drinking stories you tell us.