The Witches Brew

One night when my Long Lost Cousin and I were walking home from the movies, we decided to take a different route home. We ended up in a neighborhood of Victorian houses. I always thought these huge houses looked scary! One had a red neon sign, flickering “The Witches Brew Pub”, interesting knick-knacks for sale.

We were thirsty, so we entered. The place was dimly lit, with red leather booths and bar stools. As soon as we got our bearings, we saw a display cabinet filled with antique crystal. The whole lounge had a mirrored ceiling. Behind the bar was also a long mirror, that seemed to have pale faces staring out at you.

There were women cocktail waitresses and bartenders, all dressed in long black dresses. They had pentagram earrings and necklaces. They were all very good looking!

We both grabbed a stool.

“Hello gents, we specialize in the Witches Brew Cocktail, would you like to try one?”

“Yes, what’s in them?” I said.

“Raspberry vodka and raspberry liquor, lime and cranberry juice, ground cinnamon on top. All in a highball glass filled with ice.”

“Wow! That should have a kick to it,” said LLC.

I felt like we were being watched, maybe it was those faces in the mirror!

“This place looks like a witches den,” I remarked.

“That’s right, and we’re all witches here,” said one of the bartenders.

“Hey lady, what do you call a witch who lives at the beach?”

“Don’t know,” said the bartender witch.

“A sand-witch! That’s funny, right?” LLC was laughing!

“Yea, it went over like a lead broomstick!”

We both gulped our cocktails!

“Two more Witches Brews please.”

There was a table in the corner of the lounge full of skulls, candles and pentagrams, plus some vials of liquid labeled “Love Potion”!

“They are all for sale, must be the knick-knacks,” said LLC.

“What do these items symbolize?” I asked the lady behind the counter.

“Well, the skull represents Death, the candles are used in rituals, spells and for ambiance, and the five points of the pentagram represent the five elements, Earth, Air, Fire, Water, and Spirit or Energy.”

“Thank you for that information,” I said, smiling.

“I’m going to buy some love potion,” said LLC, laughing. “I need all the help I can get.”

“Lots of luck, cousin.”

“What is witchcraft anyway?”

“Well, I think it is the use of magical powers in Pagan religious rituals, to make you feel good, like for medicinal purposes, remember the witchdoctors? Also, to put a spell on someone for revenge.”

“Sounds interesting.”

“In the old days, in different countries, people used to have witch hunts and they executed women who were supposed to be witches.’

“What’s that big book on a stand behind the bar?”

“That’s the Book of Shadows. It contains instructions for magical rituals and spells!”

LLC raised his eyebrows in amazement.

The witch bartender went to wait on another customer.

“She’s good looking, I wonder if I can slip her one of these love potions?” LLC was laughing loudly now!

“The witches are supposed to have the power to look into the future,” I said.

“I feel another joke coming on.”

The drinks were getting to LLC!

“Why did the witch give up fortune telling?”


“There was no future in it!” LLC was rolling in the aisles now.

After two more brews we left.

The next day, when we met up. I said:

“You were really floating last night. Did you get home okay?”

“I really don’t know how I got home last night. But in the morning there was a broomstick beside my bed!!!”

8 thoughts on “The Witches Brew

  1. You Know, that love potion really worked. She came back the next night. My wife is wondering why I keep going to the broom closet.

  2. Dave’s May 10 blog Witches Brew has me smiling and laughing out loud.
    Well, a funny thing happened on my way to the coven. I read Dave’s latest blog.
    You don’t believe in Witches and their brews? Spend 10 or so minutes with Dave’s latest blog and you’ll believe in humor. Other authors only have a ghost of a chance.
    Larry Primak

  3. Nice one, Dave.
    I forgot to tell you. Witches never stand between two mirrors if they can avoid it.
    And you forgot the psychoactive incense!

    BTW, if a witch leaves a broomstick by her bed (or in it) it means she’s off to the Sabbat. Maybe she took your LLC there. What dreams did he have? Wild, I bet.
    Y&I need to talk more.

  4. Hi,Dave …here at last ! Enjoyed the Witches Brew ;it pulled together two of my interests :cousins & witchcraft . Enjoy your mentions of LLC ;genealogy drew me to one of my 4th cousins & we now meet regularly . I expect you know of the Lancashire witches …can’t claim one in the tree but my ancestors lived in the shadow of Pendle Hill .
    A few yrs ago visited the Museum of Witchcraft in Boscastle ,Cornwall .
    Keep on blogging ! You’re doing an excellent job …can’t compete …;o(

  5. Great story Dave…….Back from Chicago and catching up on the blogs…………..I can’t wait to see Larry after he gets back his trip…………I hope he takes some pictures with you………

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *